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1. Giving
Do things for others
 Caring about others is fundamental to our happiness. Helping
other people is not only good for them and a great thing to do, it
also makes us happier and healthier too. Giving also creates
stronger connections between people and helps to build a happier
society for everyone. And it's not all about money - we can also
give our time, ideas and energy. So if you want to feel good, do
good!
Doing
things for others - whether small, unplanned acts or regular
volunteering - is a powerful way to boost our own happiness as well of
those around us. The people we help may be strangers, family, friends,
colleagues or neighbours. They can be old or young, nearby or far away.
Giving
isn't just about money, so you don't need to be rich. Giving to others
can be as simple as a single kind word, smile or a thoughtful gesture.
It can include giving time, care, skills, thought or attention.
Sometimes these mean as much, if not more, than financial gifts.
Scientific
studies show that helping others boosts happiness.
[1] It increases
life satisfaction, provides a sense of meaning, increases feelings of
competence, improves our mood and reduced stress. It can help to take
our minds off our own troubles too.
[2] Kindness towards others is
be the glue which connects individual happiness with wider community and
societal well being. Giving to others helps us connect with people and meets one of our basic human needs - relatedness.
[3] Kindness
and caring also seem to be contagious. When we see someone do something
kind or thoughtful, or we are on the receiving end of kindness, it
inspires us to be kinder ourselves.
[3][4] In this way, kindness spreads
from one person to the next, influencing the behaviour of people who
never saw the original act.
Kindness really is the key to creating a
happier, more trusting local community. [5]
2. Relating
 Connect with people
Relationships are the most important overall contributor to
happiness. People with strong and broad social relationships are
happier, healthier and live longer. Close relationships with family
and friends provide love, meaning, support and increase our
feelings of self worth. Broader networks bring a sense of
belonging. So taking action to strengthen our relationships and
create new connections is essential for happiness
Our
connections with other people are at the heart of happiness - theirs
and ours. Whether these connections are with our partners, families,
friends, work colleagues, neighbours or people in our broader
communities, they all contribute to our happiness. Chris Peterson, one
of the founders of positive psychology puts it simply as: "Other people
matter".
Scholars and scientists agree about the central
importance of relationships for our well being and our happiness.
[2][3][4][5] Many studies have shown that both the quality and quantity
of social connections have an impact on our health and longevity as well
as psychological well being. [6]
Not having close personal ties
poses the same level of health risk as smoking or obesity. Having a
network of social connections or high levels of social support appears
to increase our immunity to infection, lower our risk of heart disease
and reduce mental decline as we get older. [7]
Close,
secure and
supportive relationships are the most important for well-being, whether
these are with our husband, wife, partner, relatives or friends. See
Family and Friends. Research shows that it's the quality of our
relationships that matters most. [2] This is influenced by:
- Experiencing positive emotions together - e.g. enjoyment, fun
- Being able to talk openly and feel understood
- Giving and receiving of support
- Shared activities and experiences. [8]
Just
as relationships are a two-way thing, it seems the connection between
happiness and relationships is too. Not only do relationships help to
make us happier, but also happy people tend to have more and better
quality relationships. [9]
So working on our relationships is good
for happiness and working on our happiness is good for our
relationships. That's a win all round!
3. Exercising
 Take care of your
body
Our body and our mind are connected. Being active makes us
happier as well as being good for our physical health. It instantly
improves our mood and can even lift us out of a depression. We
don't all need to run marathons - there are simple things we can
all do to be more active each day. We can also boost our well-being
by unplugging from technology, getting outside and making sure we
get enough sleep!
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 Notice the world
around
Ever felt there must be more to life? Well good news, there is!
And it's right here in front of us. We just need to stop and take
notice. Learning to be more mindful and aware can do wonders for
our well-being in all areas of life - like our walk to work, the
way we eat or our relationships. It helps us get in tune with our
feelings and stops us dwelling on the past or worrying about the
future - so we get more out of the day-to-day The
key to taking notice is 'mindfulness'. Mindfulness is often defined as
"the state of being attentive to and aware of what is taking place in
the present". [1] Two critical elements of mindfulness are that:
- It is intentional (i.e. we are consciously doing it); and
- We are accepting, rather than judging, of what we notice. [2]
In
other words, mindfulness is "openly experiencing what is there." [3] It
is about having as full as possible awareness of what is around us -
what we can see, hear, touch and taste. And what is happening inside -
our thoughts and feelings. Crucially it is about observing all this but
not getting caught up in thinking and worrying about what we are
observing. It then gives us more control of what we decide to give our
attention to.
A growing number of scientific studies are showing
the benefits of mindfulness in many aspects of our lives including our
physical and mental well-being, our relationships and our performance at
school and at work. [1][4][5] And it appears to have benefits for
everyone, from children [6] through to the elderly. [7] One researcher
even suggests that once learn, mindfulness has a 'transmitting'
quality. Its benefits increase over time and with practice and can
spread to many areas of our daily lives. [2]
Yet mindfulness is
something that, in today's busy, multi-tasking world, few of us do
naturally - but it's something everyone can learn and benefit from. It's
simple, yet can feel hard until you learn how. That's why it takes
practice.
5. Trying Out
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 Keep learning new
things
Learning affects our well-being in lots of positive ways. It
exposes us to new ideas and helps us stay curious and engaged. It
also gives us a sense of accomplishment and helps boost our
self-confidence and resilience. There are many ways to learn new
things - not just through formal qualifications. We can share a
skill with friends, join a club, learn to sing, play a new sport
and so much more.
(Outside : Our Daily Activities)
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6. Direction
Have goals to look forward
to
 Feeling good about the future is important for our happiness. We
all need goals to motivate us and these need to be challenging
enough to excite us, but also achievable. If we try to attempt the
impossible this brings unnecessary stress. Choosing ambitious but
realistic goals gives our lives direction and brings a sense of
accomplishment and satisfaction when we achieve them.
Goals
are the way we can turn our values and dreams into reality. Happiness
doesn't just happen - it comes from thinking, planning and pursuing
things that are important to us. Scientific research shows that setting
and working towards goals can contribute to happiness in various ways,
including:
- Being a source of interest, engagement or pleasure
- Giving us a sense of meaning and purpose
- Bringing
a sense of accomplishment when we achieve what we set out to (or
milestones along the way) - this also builds our confidence and belief
in what we can do in the future [2][3][4]
Goals help focus
our attention. Actively working towards them appears to be as important
for our well-being as achieving the end results we are aiming for.
Goals
are most successful when they're something we really want to achieve
and when we set them for ourselves - rather than being something someone
else wants us to do.
7. Resilience
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Find ways to bounce
back
 All of us have times of stress, loss, failure or trauma in our
lives. But how we respond to these has a big impact on our
well-being. We often cannot choose what happens to us, but we can
choose our own attitude to what happens. In practice it's not
always easy, but one of the most exciting findings from recent
research is that resilience, like many other life skills, can be
learned.
Resilience
comes from the Latin word resilio - to jump back- and is increasingly
used in everyday language to describe our ability to cope with and
bounce back from adversity. Some people describe it as the ability to
bend instead of breaking when under pressure or difficulty, or the
ability to persevere and adapt when faced with challenges.[1] The same
abilities also help to make us more open to and willing to take on new
opportunities.[1] In this way being resilient is more than just
survival, it includes letting go, learning and growing as well as
finding healthy ways to cope.[2]
Research shows that resilience
isn't a rare quality found in a few, extraordinary people. One expert in
the subject, Dr Ann Masten, describes it as 'ordinary magic' noting
that it comes from our normal, everyday capabilities, relationships and
resources.[3] She argues that resilience isn't a static characteristic
of an individual but comprises many factors, internal and external. And
we can be naturally resilient in some situations or at sometimes in our
lives and not others. Each person and each situation is different.[4]
8. Emotion
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Take a positive
approach
 Positive emotions - like joy, gratitude, contentment,
inspiration, and pride - are not just great at the time. Recent
research shows that regularly experiencing them creates an 'upward
spiral', helping to build our resources. So although we need to be
realistic about life's ups and downs, it helps to focus on the good
aspects of any situation - the glass half full rather than the
glass half empty.
For
a long time, the purpose of positive emotions has been a puzzle.
Although these feelings are nice to have it didn't appear they were
vital for our survival as a species. Negative emotions on the other
hand, were essential - helping us when we face threat by triggering by
our 'fight or flight' response. [1]
When
we see a ferocious animal charging at us, we feel fear and rapid
changes occur in our bodies and brains. Our focus of attention
instinctively narrows onto the source of danger and escape routes, and
drives us to immediate, specific responses, in this case to get the hell
out of the way.
But now ground-breaking scientific work is
showing that positive emotions have the effect of broadening our
perceptions, in much the same way that negative emotions narrow them.
This broadening helps us to see more, respond more flexibly and in new
ways and be more creative. It makes us more open to different ideas or
experiences and we feel closer to and more trusting of others. [1,2]
And
it doesn't just stop there. Feeling good in the short term can also
help us feel good in the long run. The new experiences and greater
openness that result from positive emotions can lead to lasting changes
in our lives. [1]
Let's take a few simple examples:
- A
feeling of interest in something we read can lead us to learn more
about a subject, leading to a fulfilling hobby or even a rewarding
life's work.
- Finding the same things funny as someone else can lead to them becoming a close friend or even a partner.
- Feeling
joy from seeing beautiful trees in the park can put us in a positive
frame of mind and make us more enthusiastic about an opportunity that
comes our way. [3]
So
over time, positive emotions help us to build the resources that lead to
happier lives, such as friends, knowledge, better problem solving and
even better health. What's more they can act as a buffer against stress
and help us cope when we face difficulties. [2] There is also evidence
that positive emotions can help us recover more rapidly from, or even
undo, the effects of negative emotions. [1,5]
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9. Acceptence
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 Be comfortable with who you
are
No-one's perfect. But so often we compare our insides to other
people's outsides. Dwelling on our flaws - what we're not rather
than what we've got - makes it much harder to be happy. Learning to
accept ourselves, warts and all, and being kinder to ourselves when
things go ss) and functioning well. Functioning well,
is thought to be made up of a number of key psychological factors that
contribute to how good or happy we feel. One of these factors is
self-esteem or self-acceptance[1][2]
Self-esteem, or feeling positive about ourselves [2]
has long been a subject of psychological study. Self-acceptance expands
this concept to: knowing our strengths and our weaknesses, coming to
terms with our past and feeling okay or good about ourselves while being
aware of our limitations. [1] Importantly, self-acceptance doesn't mean
ignoring what we don't do well or mistakes we've made, but it's about
working with rather than against ourselves.
Albert Ellis, a
renowned psychologist, described two choices: accepting ourselves
conditionally (i.e. only under certain conditions, for example when we
succeed) or unconditionally (under all circumstances). The first choice
he says "is deadly". If we don't fulfill the conditions we set ourselves,
and so fail, we think of ourselves as a loser or good for nothing
rather than accepting failing as a normal part of life and learning from
it. [4] If we are low on
self-acceptance, we can be troubled by aspects of who we think we are
and long to be something or someone different. [3] This can lead to
dwelling more on what's wrong with us or what we aren't, leading to a
lot of negative self-talk. And this really gets in the way of making the
most of ourselves, and of our happiness. Wrong, increases our enjoyment of life, our resilience
and our well-being. It also helps us accept others as they
are.
Psychologists
describe two parts to our well-being - feeling good (perhaps what we typically think of as happiness
10. Meaning
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